Tag Archives: relationships

The Meaning Of Marriage

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For most people, marriage is a life goal…for most women this takes on a whole other level, since we’re little girls, we’ve been fantasizing, role playing with dolls, dreaming of taking on the role of a wife and mother…

Fairytales like “cinderella”, “beauty and the beast” and “snow white” make us long for the day our prince charming will show up and we’ll ultimately live that fairy tale happily ever after… and when we grow older we continue with this longing through romantic novels, movies and TV, but reality is often very different from our expectations…

We often think about the final destination and forget to think about what it exactly means to be in a marriage…most of us think, marriage should make us happy, that our significant other should meet all our needs, satisfy all our requirements, fulfil the longing and desires we have, make our dreams come true…and that’s a tall order to fill…the reality is selfishness has no place in a marriage…marriage is about two becoming one, mind, body and soul…not each person in the marriage trying to convert the other person into doing what they want them to do…

God intended for marriage to be a ministry, where we learn to be more and more like him…to reflect the love that he has for his bride…

Today, I wanted to share a quote from Paul Washer on, the “Meaning Of Marriage” this is not a popular view of what marriage is…but it is what God intended for it to be…

The Meaning Of Marriage 

“How would you ever learn unconditional love if you were married to someone who met all the conditions? How would you ever learn mercy, patience, long-suffering, heartfelt compassion if you were married to someone who never failed you, who was never difficult with you, who never sinned against you, who was never slow to acknowledge their sin or ask for forgiveness? How would you ever learn grace to pour out your favor on someone who did not deserve it if you were married to someone who was always deserving of all good things? The main purpose of marriage is that, through your marriage, you become conformed to the image of Jesus Christ. Marriage, I believe, is the greatest instrument of sanctification.”  

- Paul Washer, God’s Glory in Marriage

Ephesians 5:25-33 (NKJV)

25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. 28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. 31 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Love Always,

XOXO

Dee

 



Love binds everything together…(Day 23) What Is Love? Challenge

love binds

(Image source)

Unity cannot exist where there is no LOVE, no matter how different we are, no matter what our background is, what life experiences we’ve gone through, where we come from, the color of our skin or how much money or success we have, there is only one thing that can unite us all and that is LOVE. At the end of the day we all seek LOVE, we seek to LOVE and to be LOVED and this is evident in our pursuits of the things of this world…the underlying need that we’re really trying to fulfill is the need for LOVE

Today’s scriptures, (Day 23) of the What Is Love? challenge, tell us once again how to live as followers of christ, but most importantly we’re told we should “put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony”

Colossians 3:8-15 (ESV)

But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices 10 and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. 11 Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.

12 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.14 And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.

Most times this world will try to blur out, what is right and what is wrong. Because of this, we’re led to believe that we lead pretty Ok lives. The media loves to sensationalize things and highlight the most dramatic things that take place in the world. Of course they do this because that’s how they attract viewership and ratings. However, you can not base your life according to what you see in the world, if you do, you may end up convincing yourself that compared to what is going on out there, I’m doing pretty ok, I’m a decent person, you know at least I haven’t done that….

However, as christians we can’t base our life on the standards of this world, our standards are kingdom standards, the bible is very clear on what is right and what is wrong,

In today’s scriptures we’re told specifically to get rid of:

  • ANGER
  • WRATH
  • MALICE
  • SLANDER
  • OBSCENE TALK
  • LIES

As followers of christ we have to get rid of our old selves and put on a new self, one that is being renewed in knowledge, the ultimate goal is to be more like the image of our creator. As christians we are all one and we’re all connected together in unity by his LOVE.

As new people we’re supposed to exude the following characteristics:

  • COMPASSIONATE HEARTS
  • KINDNESS
  • HUMILITY
  • MEEKNESS
  • PATIENCE
  • FORGIVENESS

Above everything that we’re called to be, the most important is LOVE!!! Love brings everything together in perfect HARMONY and where there is LOVE there is PEACE. Let our lives and hearts be ruled by PEACE. Not forgetting to be thankful and remain content about everything and in every season of our lives.

Love Always,

XOXO

Dee

 



Do nothing out of Selfish Ambition…(Day 22) What Is Love? Challenge

phillipians 2: 1 - 11

This is perhaps the most “SELF” driven time, than any other time in history…although social media is supposed to connect people, it seems like it’s main purpose is to advertise SELF

look at me…

look at what I have,

look at who I’m with,

look at what I’ve done,

look at where I am,

look at what I’ve achieved,

look at what I’m doing…

this ME/I centered WORLD places people’s value on what they can bring to the table and what they can offer… this is the currency for relationships…

But God’s standard for RELATIONSHIPS are so much higher as we see in today’s scripture…(Day 22 of the What Is Love? Challenge)

Philippians 2:1-11  (NIV)

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

Who, being in very nature God,
    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
rather, he made himself nothing
    by taking the very nature of a servant,
    being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man,
    he humbled himself
    by becoming obedient to death—
        even death on a cross!

Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
    and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
    in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
    to the glory of God the Father.

 

Honestly, this is one of my favorite bible verses because, I’ve lived it!!! I’ve been in relationships where people put their Selfish Ambition and vain conceit above the relationship you share….

I’ve been in relationships where people are only there because they can get something from you and once you can’t offer them what they need or you need something, they Vamos…

I’ve also been in situations where people don’t see the value you can bring them so they chose to ignore you, look down on you or even disrespect you!!!

character

In this world there’s a hierarchy, where most people will only give you the time of the day or put in effort if they know you can be beneficial to them somehow either in present time or in the future…

However, Kingdom standards say our calling as christians is to walk in humility serving God and others, following the great character of Christ…

Even though we can do nothing for Christ, he died for us…

he showed great character by serving us even though we had nothing to offer him nor can we repay him for the sacrifice he’s done for us…that’s TRUE LOVE!

Jesus became a servant, he became the lowest in the hierarchy of this world while he is the highest in God’s eyes…

he could’ve said, “there’s nothing these humans can offer me…” “why should I bother while they are ungrateful….”

he could’ve abused his Godly power and majesty by using it for his own gain, advantage or selfish ambitions…

yet he walked in humility, humbled himself and served us…

as the body of Christ this is exactly how we’re supposed to treat others…Our greatest example is Jesus Christ and we’re supposed to emulate him in our earthly relationships…

not to look down, disrespect or ignore those who have ‘nothing’ to offer us…actually quite the opposite, we’re supposed to serve others no matter where they are in the worldly “hierarchy”…

Just like Jesus we’re called to Serve others, walk in humility like he did and value others above ourselves…

and that’s the Kingdom standard for relationships…not living for SELF rather living to Serve God and others. Everything’s for his Glory. Not living for our own Selfish Ambitions, Vain Conceit, earthly desires but living within His will…saying Not my Will LORD but May your will be done.

Love always,

XOXO,

Dee

 

 



We’re here for RELATIONSHIPS…(Day 20) What Is Love? Challenge

trinity

This past Sunday, our church service was dedicated to exploring the Trinity of God…and as part of the sermon our pastor brought to our attention this beautiful piece of Art, “The Trinity” by Andrei Rublev which depicts God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Without going into the whole history of this painting, I just wanted to talk about it’s significance as explained by our pastor. That even before the heavens and earths were created, God existed within an interconnected RELATIONSHIP driven by LOVE.

If you explore the story of creation in Genesis, God created man in his image,

Genesis 1:26-28 (NIV)

26 Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.”

Man (Adam) was formed to have a relationship with God and next he was given the woman (Eve) so that they can have a relationship with each other, so that they can form a union…which is the institution of marriage as we know it today, the most important institution created by God,

Genesis 2:18 (ESV)

18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Genesis 2:24 (ESV)

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

and as we discussed on Day 1 of the “What Is Love? Challenge” the greatest command is to LOVE…to love God and to love others…love can only exist within a relational state with others. We can’t say we love God and ignore to express his love that lives within us, to others. And we can’t live like Islands, as long as we live on this earth we will form various forms of relationships with others. And God calls us to love them as he has loved us.

Therefore, the whole purpose of our existence is to have a loving relationship with God and mirror God’s love in our relationships with others.

This brings me to today’s verse from Day 20 of the “What Is Love? challenge”

1 Peter 3:8-12 (ESV)

Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. 10 For

“Whoever desires to love life
    and see good days,
let him keep his tongue from evil
    and his lips from speaking deceit;
11 let him turn away from evil and do good;
    let him seek peace and pursue it.
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous,
    and his ears are open to their prayer.
But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

Today’s verses, teach us, how as mirrors of God’s love, we are supposed to relate to others. God calls us as a body of christ to be united and of one mind… God is our head, and although we’re part of his body and may have different functions, we all exist for one purpose to glorify him, therefore we should all strive to keep this in mind and stand together in unity.

Next we are called to be, sympathetic, loving, tender hearted (kind, gentle, compassionate) and humble…reflecting the characteristics of God.

Following in the steps of christ we are not supposed to repay evil for evil but to bless those who mistreat us and leave judgement to God….the same way Jesus forgave and prayed for those who crucified him…if we behave in this way God will also bless us…

Next we’re advised if we want love life and see good days we’re to keep our speech from evil or lies, keep everything pure and transparent, turn away from doing evil and instead do good, seek peace and pursue it…

We’re reminded that God sets his eyes on the righteous and he hears their prayer, but hides his face from those who do evil…

so today let’s pray and ask God to help us:

have a good relationship with him and with others so that we may glorify him,

exist in love and mirror his love in our relationship with others,

to be united in mind with other believers, to be sympathetic, loving, tender hearted and humble,

not pay evil for evil but have the strength to forgive and bless those who mistreat us,

turn away from evil and always do good,

keep our speech from evil and lies,

seek and pursue peace,

 - Amen

Love Always,

Dee